


Paper Hearts

by Jaye_nim



Series: The promise [1]
Category: NINE PERCENT (Band)
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, a hint of something between xukun and ziyi and zhengting, a little yanjun/zhengting, almost smut but none, bartender yanjun, cai xukun and his past, calm ziyi and his memory lost, fluffy zhu zhengting, heart breaking, no one is straight in here, overwheling sadness, player xiao gui, promise breaking, soft cai xukun, yanjun and xiao gui at the side
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-07 10:33:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16406780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaye_nim/pseuds/Jaye_nim
Summary: Where zikun were childhood friends, before ziyi moved away. Leaving xukun alone.Xukun has nothing to hold on exept for their promise 12 years ago. But xukun realizes nothing lasts forever, so he moves on. He thought he did, before he met ziyi after 12 long years. and things get a little too complicated.Also zhengting at the side, having the biggest crush on xukun, which the boy didn't realize (or maybe he does?).





	Paper Hearts

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know if i did the right thing of posting this now.  
> But first of all, the story is not supposed to be this long. I was planning on a 5000 words but end up writing too much on one chapter. took me 4 months for this.  
> And second, don't worry for the second and/or third part of the story, i'll try to post it ASAP. Like really soon, maybe next week, maybe next month, idk.  
> Okay, i think i wrote too long of a note. So, just enjoy this - my first ever nine percent fanfic.

_July 2018_

Accompanied by the sun peeking on the horizon, xukun sits under a tree on the beach. His hair wet from the recent swim he did a minute before.

"Hey, bro. How's your morning swim?" a shorter boy greets him, passing a canned beer.

"Xiao gui," xukun nods his head once to the said boy, his friend of 5 years, "the swim was fine, though it's a bit chilly today. I only made it half way before returning."

"That's too bad." xiao gui comments, which gets no reply from xukun.

The two stays silent for a while. Only the occasion sipping sounds can be heard from either of them.

"I can never get used to this. Cai xukun and his little mourning session." Xiao gui shakes his head in disapproval.

"I wasn't mourning! I just had a lot in my mind." Xukun defends himself.

Xiao gui laughs, "as if! You always has that look once every once in a while."

"Shut up. Or i'm leaving." Xukun threatens, which definitely doesn't work on the latter.

"You are free to leave. No one is going to stop you," xiao gui mocks xukun, before adding, "except for those girls in bikinis who always asks for your number."

Xukun stands up, "i don't even know why we're friends in the first place. Why are we friends again?".

Xiao gui shrugs, as a smirk forms on his face. He bids goodbye before xukun leaves. Telling him to screw off. Xukun sighs before standing up. He did enough reminiscing for the day. It's time to head home and go to work.

The time ticks exactly at 12 when xukun arrives at the animal shelter where he works at. An older boy, zhengting, greets him with a cheerful smile, fully knowing xukun is 2 hours late. Xukun returns it half-hearted, not feeling too great about his day.

"Zhengting ge," xukun suddenly calls for the older boy.

Zhengting smiles as he turns to xukun, "yes, kun? Is anything wrong?".

"There's something i want to talk about," xukun says, fidgeting with his fingers, "i think i should treat you to dinner later. If that's okay with you."

"Of course. I'm free tonight. I'm always free at night, actually." A smile crawls to zhengting's lips.

"Sure then. I'll wait for you later after work? My shift ends before sun down." Xukun smiles before taking the two dogs in the shelter with him for an afternoon walk.

Xukun does his daily work of walking the dogs by the beach, as they prefer him over zhengting. The two dogs would run around for a couple of hours, sniffing the sand and running on the shore, while xukun only watch them.

When xukun walks pass the space where he met xiao gui earlier, the boy is still there. He's busy talking with a few tanned girls, who are busy shoving their tits to the only boy. Xukun looks away in displeased with the view.

"Kun ge! What are you up to?" Xiao gui greets xukun from where he is seated.

"Hey, i'm just doing work, as you can see." Xukun waves back, showing the leashes he's holding.

"Why don't you join us? Come here, i'll treat you for a drink." Xiao gui calls for xukun to sit beside him.

Xukun quickly declines, "i'm busy, gui. There are other stuff i need to do by today."

xiao gui pouts upon seeing xukun saying no to him, "don't be such a wimp, bro. Your boss won't know you're skipping work. Except if that gay worker tells on you."

"Can you please stop bad mouthing zhengting, he's a decent person." Xukun stalls, unpleased with xiao gui's words.

"Okay, fine. I'm sorry for teasing your pretty friend." Xiao gui snickers on his own joke.

Xukun rolls his eyes, too tired to start a debate. "Gui, i should really get going. Unlike you, i have so much going on in my life."

Xiao gui seems offended for a second, but the smile returns to his lips, "okay, bro. Whatever suits you. Just be sure to be here tonight."

"I doubt i'll make it. I have plans," xukun stands up before dusting off the sand from his pants, "i'll just see you tomorrow".

With that xukun leaves the beach. He doesn't feel like walking the dogs anymore, so he decides to return to the shelter. Zhengting won't get suspicious, like hell he ever does.

The shelter is locked when xukun returns. Maybe zhengting went out to get some stuff. Instead of going inside, he takes the two dogs to the yard. Xukun takes the long hose, ready to spray them on the dogs.

"Come here, you'll need a bath in this hot weather. It'll cool you down." Xukun calls for the dogs and they listens to his words.

The dogs wiggle their tails as xukun sprays water onto their body. Xukun doesn't forget to scrub some soap on the dogs to make them clean. But as he is about to rinse the soap off, one of the dogs runs away.

Xukun chases the dog around the yard, half laughing. That is until he stumbles on zhengting. He seems to have returned from wherever he was going.

"Hey, you're back?" Xukun greets zhengting with a wide grin still plastered on his face.

"Yeah, just got back from delivering some cat foods down the street." Zhengting shrugs, "you're bathing the dogs?".

"Yes. But they became mischievous one second ago. I guess things got a bit out of control." Xukun sheepishly rubs his nape in embarasment.

"I'll lend you a hand." Zhengting offers, already rolling his jeans in case they get wet.

"It's nothing, really. You don't have to," xukun tries not to get zhengting involved. But the boy is busy chasing after the dogs.

Xukun joins zhengting soon, spraying water towards the dogs. They are supposed to finish in 10 minutes, if they did it effectively. However, since xukun doesn't mind getting off work late, he plays with zhengting and the dogs.

The two's laughter fills the whole yard, gaining attention from the passerby. But they don't mind. Not when they're having fun.

As zhengting manages to catch the dogs, xukun rinses them. The two then plan to take the animal inside. But xukun, being his clumsy self, trips on the hose and falls on the wet ground.

Zhengting comes to rescue, "oh my, are you okay? Try to stand up." He then helps xukun to his feet.

"I'm fine. Just a little, oof-" xukun takes zhengting's extended hand, but since he got the wrong footing, he leans towards zhengting. Lucky enough, the older catches xukun before he could get in contact with the ground.

"Oh, be careful there. Don't want to ruin your face, do you?" Zhengting jokes, pulling xukun to stand on his own.

"Sorry. I stepped on the wrong ground." Xukun apologizes. He looks away to hide heated cheeks.

Zhengting only hums in reply. He then takes the dogs into their cages before returning with a towel. Xukun doesn't dare to move as he lets the older dry his hair.

"These animals are really such a pain in the ass." Zhengting shakes his head, trying to start a conversation.

Xukun agrees, "I know right. I don't know why i started working here." Maybe it's because of zhengting. Or maybe he just wants to.

"You should get changed. Before you catch a cold." Zhengting finally stops drying xukun's hair.

"Right. I'll just head home for now and come back to get you later." Only after zhengting speaks that xukun could finally think straight.

"I'll be done by 7. Don't arrive too early, or i'll feel bad for making you wait." Zhengting reminds the younger before he leaves.

Xukun nods, "got it. I'll be back just in time. Don't worry."

\---

Exactly at 7 p.m. xukun waits in front of the shelter. His back leaning on the wall beside the door as he takes his phone out. Just in time, zhengting emerges from the door.

Zhengting's hair catches xukun's attention. Did zhengting do his hair just for him? It can't be true. Why would he even go through the trouble?

"See? I knew you would arrive early. I told you to take your time!" Zhengting complains, hitting xukun on the shoulder, "i hate you."

"I just got here. Come on now, let's go." Xukun leads the way without wiating for zhengting.

Zhengting has to take a few long strides to match xukun's pace. "Where are we going?" Zhengting asks as he is walking beside xukun.

Xukun doesn't turn around when he answers, "someplace by the beach."

"You mean the cafe which you turned down a bunch of girls who were supposed to be your blind date?" Zhengting asks.

"No. Tonight i'm taking you somewhere else. Somewhere more private." Xukun stops to face zhengting this time.

"W-what? Why?" Zhengting stammers as he gets flustered with the sudden eye contact.

"I need to tell you something. And i want tonight to be special." Xukun smiles, offering his hand.

Zhengting only eyes the offered hand, making xukun tilt his head. Tired of waiting, xukun charges for the older's hand, wrapping it inside his. The action left zhengting at lost for words.

"Don't get me wrong. I just want us to arrive faster. You're taking too much time walking." Xukun explains after pulling zhengting by the hand.

"O-of course. I thought so too." Zhengting whispers the last sentence more to himself. But xukun heard him, he always does.

"Don't be too disappointed, ting ge. I might also have the urge to hold your hand." Xukun offers a sweet smile to zhengting.

"Who said i was?" Zhengting turns to face xukun.

"Come on, we're almost there." Xukun tugs on zhengting's hand, which earns a nod from the older.

"Cold bar?" Zhengting reads the board above the front door, "what does that even mean?" he asks xukun.

"You wouldn't want to know that," xukun mumbles, leading them inside

"Wow," zhengting breathes after the two are seated side by side on one of the tables.

"You okay, ge?" Xukun fixes his gaze to zhengting, trying to figure out what he thinks.

Zhengting answers after a second, "Yeah, i'm good. Just a bit overwhelmed."

Xukun nods, calling the bartender to place an order. He asks for two servings of beer without confirming zhengting's order.

It doesn't take long for their beer to be served. Xukun instantly chugs down half of his drink, clearly trying to get himself drunk. Xukun is pondering on the right timing to speak up.

"So, what is this all about? I thought you were going to treat me dinner?" Zhengting tilts his head.

Xukun shakes his head, "i was, but i changed my mind last minute."

"Why? Do you need a little courage to tell me or something? You know you can tell me anything," zhengting assures the younger.

"I know, but i can't help feeling jittery and all." Xukun sighs before gulping down the rest of his beer.

"Don't feel burdened, kun. You can tell me anytime when you're ready." Zhengting reaches for xukun's hand.

"Okay, i'll tell you now." Xukun makes up his mind, "i'm sorry to tell you this right now- but i'm moving to Shenzhen." Xukun tells him.

"What? When? Why?" Zhengting mutters, unable to process what the younger said.

"I'm moving next month. They needed extra employees on their shelter and all," xukun explains, "the boss reccomended that i go."

"Oh," is the only thing zhengting manages to say, "it's okay. I understand."

Xukun lays his hands on top of zhengting's this time. He did it to comfort the older, knowing for sure how much zhengting cherishes their relationship. Zhengting adores him, and yet here he is, breaking the poor boy's heart.

"Ting ge, you don't have to hide it. I know how much you're hurting inside." Xukun looks at zhengting, who is currently looking down.

"No. I'm fine, really." Zhengting fakes a smile, "you should go, kun. It's always been your dream to travel around China."

Xukun nods, before opening his mouth, "I'm sorry, for telling you this late."

"No, thank you for telling me this right now. It matters to me, a lot." Zhengting fixes his gaze into xukun's clear beads.

For a few minutes, the two boys doesn't exchange any words. Both too preoccupied with their own thoughts to start a conversation. That is, before xukun decides he should also tell zhengting the other reason why he had asked the older out earlier today.

"Ting ge, i want to tell you something else. To be honest, I've known." Xukun starts their conversation after the long recess.

Xukun's words catches zhengting's attention. Making him look at the younger, tilting his head, "know what? What are you talking about, kun?"

"I know, ge. About everything. Your feelings towards me, it's not just friendship, is it?" Xukun offers a thin smile, hoping not to shock the other too much.

"Wait- you knew? How-?" Zhengting didn't move, eyes wide. He seems to be shocked with the news he just heard.

"You were being quite obvious of it, actually. Always that heart filled eyes, always that charming smile, always that cheerful tone." Xukun bites his lips in order not to look too depressed.

"But why? Why tell me now?" Zhengting tries to process what he just heard, "you should've told me from the start!"

Xukun is unexpectedly calmer on the outside despite how he felt indside, "i wanted you to know. That you're the best friend i could ever ask for. I don't have it in me to break your heart."

"You just did, cai xukun" zhengting seems disappointed, but he stays in place. The outcome is quite different than what xukun visualized.

"I'm sorry," xukun whispers, "you're too good for me, ting ge. While i'm broken and my life is a bunch of shit."

Zhengting shakes his head, disagreeing with the younger. "No, don't say that. You're much more than that, you mean a lot to me, kun." Zhengting reaches for xukun, embracing him in his arms.

"I liked you, ge. I really do. But you should know that i still can't get over my first crush yet. I don't want to give you any false hope," xukun tells the older, sighing in the process.

"It's been hard on you. I know that there's something holding you back, kun. And i'm grateful that you actually think nicely of me." Zhenting caresses xukun's back in a circular motion, calming the younger.

"I know i'm in no place to say this, but you have to move on, okay? Forget about me, and live a better life." Xukun buries his face deeper in zhengting's shoulder.

"I can't promise that i will forget you. I won't. But you have my word, i'll move on from these feelings," zhengting promises the younger.

Xukun inhales zhengting's scent, one he's become familiar with - summer sea with a little bit of citrus. "It's okay. I won't forget you too, ge."

This isn't like what xukun imagined when he made his mind to tell zhengting. He thought the older would cry, and xukun would lull him in his arms. Not the other way around. Xukun doesn't want to seem fragile in front of zhengting. He needs to look strong, but his body gives in to zhengting's comforting touch.

Zhengting contemplates for a while before opening his mouth. "Kun, about your first crush. Do i know him?" He gets a no from the younger.

"He moved. I haven't seen him for over a decade." Xukun mumbles, still in zhengting's arms.

"That's too bad. I was going to give him a lesson for hurting you," zhengting jokes to make the atmosphere lighter.

Xukun flashes zhengting a smile, showing that he's okay. Then he stands up to ask for a refill on his drink. The bartender, yanjun, beams at xukun as he puts his empty glass on the bar.

"Seems like you have company today, kun? Never seen this one before." The older smirks. 

Xukun turns to glance at zhengting, who's currently looking back at him, before facing yanjun. "He's a colleague. Nothing new."

"New to me, at least." Yanjun replies, handing xukun a new glass of beer. "What's his name?".

"Zhengting." Xukun's head suddenly perks up, "if you ever try anything stupid on him, i'll kill you."

Yanjun laughs openly at xukun's words. As if he said something worth the laugh. "Okay, okay. I get it. I just thought he's cute."

Xukun glares at yanjun, not fully buying what he said. But xukun doesn't press it any further. Instead, he chugs down the glass of beer in front of him in one shot.

Only after banging the glass on the counter that xukun feels light headed.  And he likes it. He wants to forget everything that has happened tonight. The problems may not disappear, but at least it's out of his mind.

"Can you get me another glass," xukun pushes the empty glass to yanjun a second time.

"Take it easy, kun. You'll burn your insides at this rate." Yanjun warns him, but xukun shakes him off.

"D-don't stop me." Xukun slurs at his words, the beer taking effect on his body.

Just as xukun's world is spinning, he feels an arm sneaks on his waist. He finds zhengting's face beside his, full of concern. Xukun lets himself melt onto zhengting, his head leaning on the older's neck.

The last thing xukun remembers from the night is him resting on zhengting's shoulder, before everything becomes black.

\---

Xukun wakes up to bright lights blinding his closed eyes. Groaning, he looks around to find himself in the stoarge room. Xukun tries to get up but his head throbs as soon as he moves a muscle. So he decides it's best to lay back in bed.

He feels nauseous and hungover, which is a sign that he drinks last night. But xukun can't seem to remember what happens after he drank the second glass of beer.

"Oh, you're awake. You must feel shitty right now." Zhengting's head appears by the door, his face smiling. "Here, have some coffee." Zhengting offers the drink in his hand.

"I'd rather have some tea, thanks." Xukun's voice comes out a little hoarse.

"Right. I'll just get you some water." Zhengting then disappears before returning with a cup of water in hand. He hands it over to xukun, which the latter accepts gladly.

Zhengting hums as he waits for xukun to finish the drink, so he can take it back. Xukun takes the clue, reaching out to return the cup.

"Your friend came over, by the way. He said hi." Zhengting tells xukun as he left the room.

Xukun tries to sit up a second time, this time cussing as he manages to get on his feet. Xukun follows zhengting towards the shelter, "which friend did you mean? Xiao gui?" He asks.

"No. It was yanjun, the one from the bar last night." Zhengting says without facing xukun. "He got me coffee," he adds.

"You two knew each other?" Xukun tilts his head, not fully understanding the situation.

"Not before you brought me to the bar last night and fell asleep on me." Zhengting shrugs.

Xukun mentally cussed for not remembering about last night's events. "Tell me didn't try anything weird on you, please."

Zhengting stops his hands midway feeding the rabbit, "if making me drink the glass of beer you order isn't weird, then we're good."

"That's- not weird. Okay." Xukun sighs, at least zhengting is safe for now. "But please do tell me if you're planning on meeting him again in the future. So i can prepare myself."

Zhengting laughs at what xukun says. "Why do you need to? When i'm the one meeting him. I'm not saying that i will, though."

"So i can runaway. He's the cold jokes emperor. I don't want to cringe to death." Xukun reasons.

"Is it really that bad? I do get that he's the biggest flirt in town." Zhengting asks, resuming to feed the rabbit.

"Just wait and see." Xukun pats zhengting's shoulder as he passes the older, ready to open the door.

Zhengting stops him midway, "uh, kun. You might want to check your face before you head out."

Xukun follows zhengting's advice to fix his looks before heading out. After what he went through last night, xukun feels like he needs a long shower and some sleep. He'll just skip work for the day. Zhengting's going to cover for him anyway, like he always does.

\---

As soon as xukun is home, he takes off his clothes, throwing them randomly on the floor. He makes it safely under the shower, despite the nauseating feeling in his lower abdomen. After taking the longest shower in the human history, xukun puts on some random clothes he could find and climbs to bed.

Xukun drifts off to dreamland as soon as his head touches the soft matress. He dreams of last night. Each detail replays in his mind. This time he remembers how he returned. He was leaning on a sturdy back as they walk along the beach.

Xukun's eyes instantly lost it's desire to rest as he opens them. Wait, how did zhengting manage to carry him from the bar back to the shelter. Sure, zhengting has a smaller frame, somewhat fragile in xukun's eyes. But he is sure it was zhengting carying him last night. Or was it someone else?

"Crap! It must be someone else!" Xukun slaps his face after remembering that he saw zhengting walking beside him. So the one carrying him can't be zhengting. It's someone else.

Xukun doesn't seem to regain the memory of the stranger's face before. But after trying again, he could somewhat make out his features. His eyes were calm, hair tied back, a thin smile completing his look.

When xukun thinks again, boy does seem familiar. As if he knew the boy before. But where did they meet? Xukun can't seem to recall. Imagining his face makes xukun sure, the boy has the same features as his long lost crush. But it can't be him, right?

Without thinking twice, xukun gets changed from his filthy clothes. He grabs a white shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants before running out of the house. Not forgetting to lock the door, even if he is in a hurry to meet the older.

"Xukun!" Zhengting's sharp voice greets xukun as he almost slams himself on the door.

Xukun takes a few breathes before starting to speak. "Zhu zhengting, please tell me you're the one who brought me here last night."

Zhengting tilts his head, "what do you mean? Of course i was the one who brought you to the shelter."

"No, i meant you were the one who gave me a piggy back down the beach, right? Tell me it was you." Xukun rather begs for the other to say yes, so his mind could be at ease.

"Oh, you meant the guy from last night?" Zhengting laughs, "it was some guy i just met. He offered a hand to carry you, and i accepted. It's no big deal."

"Some guy you just met. I mean, how could you entrust me with some random stranger like that?" Xukun complains.

"He's not a stranger. I met him a few days ago, when he wanted to adopt the kitten right there." Zhengting points to the cage at the end of the room.

"His name. Tell me his name, ge." Xukun bit his lips nervously, betting on the last hope he has.

A smile tugs on zhengting's lips, "you're interested in him? How cute." He stops for a moment before telling xukun the boy's name, "ziyi. His name is wang ziyi."

The second xukun hears his name for the first time in a decade, his legs give in. He has to balance himself on the counter so he wouldn't fall flat on the floor.

"Kun, are you okay? What's wrong?" Zhengting approaches the younger, hands placed softly on his shoulder.

Xukun shakes his head, "i'm fine, ge. It's just that - they have the same name, and i don't know how to react."

"Who? Who has the same name?" Zhengting asks out of curiosity. He still has his hands on xukun's shoulder blades, calming him.

"The boy i liked, his name was wang ziyi. He was so perfect, beautiful in every way." Xukun's voice is low, almost inaudible. But enough for zhengting to hear him.

"Wow. I'm sorry, kun." Zhengting rubs his hand on xukun's back in a circular motion.

"It's okay, ge. It's not your fault. You didn't know." Xukun offers a weak smile to zhengting.

"Why don't you take a rest-" xukun lets zhengting lead him to the storage room. That is before the door bell suddenly rings, indicating a costumer just came in.

The two stops in their track, focusing their attention to the costumer. Xukun's breath hitched as he saw the boy by the door.

"Ziyi. Hi." Zhengting instantly has a smile plastered on his face.

The said boy smiles, "hi. I was wondering if the kitten is available now?". Ziyi approach the two.

"I'm afraid we still have to wait a couple of days. The kitten is still weak." Zhengting ushers ziyi to take a look at the kitten.

"Oh wait," ziyi suddenly stops in front of xukun. "You must be xukun. The drunk boy from last night?"

Zhengting turns to xukun. "Kun, this is ziyi. The boy who brought you here."

Xukun nods, unable to speak. He needs time to process the view in front of him. The boy looks just like his crush. Even his name is the same. But why doesn't he recognize xukun?

"Hey, are you okay?" Ziyi reaches for xukun's pale face. But xukun takes a step back.

"I-i'm sorry" xukun whispers, looking down to hide his face.

Zhengting then grabs xukun by the shoulder. "Ziyi, why don't you look around for a moment. I'll be right back."

"Okay." Ziyi steps back, before adding, "get well soon."

Xukun doesn't reply ziyi's call. His mind too occupied with recalling how the younger ziyi was like. Was he this bright when he was younger? Was he this attractive?

"Kun? Are you with me?" Xukun doesn't react to zhengting's hand in front of him, which makes the latter worry.

"I-" xukun starts to mumble. He can't seem to arrange a decent enough sentence for zhengting to understand.

Zhengting sits xukun on the matress as they reach the storage room. The one which xukun slept on last night.

"Just take a rest. You're probably too exhausted to even speak. It's okay, baobei." Zhengting whispers softly into xukun's ear as he pats his hair lovingly.

Xukun looks up for the first time since they arrived. Zhengting just called xukun baby. Not that xukun's never heard zhengting say the word. He's heard the latter use the world plenty of times. It's just that, it's the first time zhengting addresses him like that.

Their eyes lock for a minute. Xukun tries to read whatever is in zhengting's mind. But to his luck, he finds nothing. Not even a hint of disappointment.

"Kun," the way zhengting calls his name makes xukun's heart flutter. "I have to go. Ziyi is waiting for me. I'll be back soon, okay."

Xukun nods twice, acknowledging zhengting's departure. But his hand doesn't let go of zhengting's shirt. When he realizes his action, xukun pulls his hand in embarasment. He must be out of his mind.

As zhengting leaves the room, xukun slumps in bed. He faces the ceiling, one arm over his eyes while the other clutching the matress. His mind floods with the memories he long forgets. About the their childhood memories. About how xukun really felt towards him.

\---

_January 2006_

One windy morning in beijing, a family of three packs their things to a moving truck. The son, ziyi, has his backpack on one of his shoulders while the other holding a duffle bag consisting of his clothes. While his parents move their remaining things, ziyi places his bags on the passenger seat.

"Ziyi ge, don't leave!" Seven-year-old xukun shouts, running after his only friend.

"I can't stay. My father says life will be better at the city. So we're moving." Ziyi tells the younger.

"But what about us? You're my only friend here." Xukun pouts, bloating his chubby cheeks.

Ziyi smiles, "there's plenty of other kids around. I'm sure you'll get a new friend soon."

"But ge, they're childish! And strange!" Xukun tries to reason out.

A chuckle leaves the older's lips, "and you're not? you're such a funny kid, cai xukun."

"Can't you just stay? You can stay at my place. I'll tell my mom," xukun tries to figure out ways for his gege to stay.

"Thanks, but no thanks. I prefer to stay with my parents." Ziyi ruffles xukun's messy hair.

As a kid, xukun can't help but wail. He doesn't want his only friend to move away from the shore. They've lived their whole live as fishermen's sons, and suddenly ziyi's dad got an offer. So his whole family is moving to the city to get a better life.

Even after crying for the whole morning, ziyi still leaves with his family. So xukun's plead goes down the drain. He never suceed in making ziyi stay. Instead, he merely got a promise from ziyi.

"Don't cry xukun. A big boy doesn't cry, remember?" ziyi wipes xukun's tears away while the latter just bobs his head.

"Ziyi, it's time to go!" Ziyi's mother calls for him.

"Coming, ma." Ziyi replies shortly, not wanting his parents to drag him into the vehicle.

"Ge, do you have to move?" Xukun tries to beg again, only to earn a nod from the older.

Ziyi holds xukun's shoulder, "you know what, let's make a promise. We shall meet under the wishing tree by the beach. The one we always went to".

Xukun smiles for the first time today, "you have to come every month! We can fold paper hearts and hang them on the tree".

"Every month would be too hard. But i'll try to come every year. I promise." Ziyi holds out his pinky for xukun to take.

Xukun finally gives in, sealing their promise by hooking their pinkies. Xukun hugs ziyi for the last time before the boy jumps into the truck. They wave to each other, the window separating the two.

Xukun still waves his tiny hand in the air even after the car is out of sight. He still can't believe he's lost the only person he cares about beside his family.

After taking a deep breath, xukun decides to head home. It was windy that day, as if the weather feels the same as his empty heart. The boy kicks every peble in his way, feeling like a loner. What else could he do. Other than wait for ziyi's return every once in a year.

 

_June 2009_

Summer is just around the corner. And xukun feels giddy of how he would spend the holidays with his ziyi ge. This year, ziyi promises to spend the whole summer with xukun. Upon hearing the news, xukun can't stop smiling as he counts the days before summer break officially begins.

As ziyi and his family arrives on the doorstep, xukun greets them with a cheerful smile. Mr and Mrs wang give xukun a warm hug before entering the house to greet xukun's parents. Ziyi stays behind, grinning as he come face to face with the younger.

"You've become manlier." Is the first comment ziyi throws as they met for the first time since last year.

"O-of course! I'm a man after all." Xukun doesn't know why he stutters at his words.

Is it because they haven't met in a long time? Or is it because ziyi has turned very handsome and mature over the span of a year? Xukun can't quite pinpoint which of the two is the reason.

"Are you going to give me a hug or not? Don't leave me hanging here." Ziyi's smile grows as he opens his arm for xukun to jump onto.

Without much thought, xukun embraces his ge. Although the two haven't met for a long time, there is no awkwardness between the two. Xukun could feel how much ziyi grows as he is now only a little above ziyi's ears.

"You're so short. How cute." Ziyi comments as they pull away.

Xukun turns red at ziyi's words. "You're only a few centimeters taller than me. You have no right to call me short, wang ziyi!"

"Of course i do. I'm your ge." Ziyi laughs, ruffling xukun's his hair.

"Don't mess up my hair." Xukun fixes his hair. He then leaves ziyi outside as he enters his house.

Xukun doesn't know why his heart beats hard on his ribcage, threatening to break free. Or why his face burns at the sight of wang ziyi.

Ziyi doesn't forget to bring xukun a present from the city. He always brings one for the younger. Either a misic player, a dvd consisting the latest movies, or a headphone. However this year, ziyi gives him something as common as a black leather jacket.

"What do you say, kun?" Mrs cai reminds her child.

"But- i mean, i like it. Thanks, ge. But why are you giving me this?" Xukun eyes the jacket which definitely isn't really his style.

"They're the latest trend in the city. I thought you might want one." Ziyi sheepishly smiles.

"Ziyi spent last month's savings on that jacket. He thought it will look good on you." Mrs wang tells xukun, ignoring her son's groan.

"Oh. I'll use it well ge." Xukun finally lets out a sincere smile.

"Why don't you try it on then? I want to see my son in the handsome jacket." Mrs cai pushes xukun to try the jacket on, but he refuses. Maybe next time.

\---

The sun is almost set as ziyi and xukun walks side by side to the beach. Xukun invited ziyi to take a stroll down the beach, which the older agrees right away.

Xukun stops in his tracks as the tree comes in view. Their wishing tree is full of folded paper hearts. Most of them are xukun's hearts, while it only holds 9 of ziyi's. Xukun approaches the tree, feeling the branches, taking a look at the hearts.

"This one must be yours. Look at how ugly you wrote your name." Xukun shows ziyi a certain pink paper heart.

"I was only five when i wrote it." Ziyi takes the folded paper from xukun. He reads it out loud, "i wish my mother would let me eat ice cream."

Xukun laughs. "What kind of wish is that? Ge, were you seriously that childish?"

Ziyi huffs. "Let's see yours now. Yours are probably as childish as mine." He then takes a neatly folded white paper heart with xukun's name.

"Come on, read it for us. What does it say?" Xukun tries to peek through ziyi's shoulder, but he is too short.

"I wish ziyi ge didn't move from the shore." Ziyi finally reads xukun's writing.

"That one is quite new. Probably two years ago." Xukun takes the paper from ziyi and returns it to the tree.

Ziyi then takes another heart, reading it to himself. Then he takes another. And before he knows it, ziyi is frantically reading every paper hearts on the tree.

On the other hand, xukun watches the older. But can't seem to focus on how funny ziyi looks when he is desperate. Instead, xukun lose himself in admiring ziyi's hair. And his eyes, nose, lips. Everything ziyi has is flawless.

"You wrote about me. About us." Ziyi states after he finish reading every single heart on the tree.

"Of course. I told you i'm not childish." Xukun smirks in victory. It's the first time he defeats ziyi and he's enjoying it.

"You cheated didn't you? You probably changed all the hearts and made sure we came here." Ziyi eyes xukun suspiciously.

Xukun shakes his head. "I'm not that low. I still have my pride. Besides, how would you explain about the yellowish texture?"

"Okay. I admit defeat. You win, cai xukun." Ziyi doesn't look the little bit disappointed. He ruffles xukun's hair with his hand, as if he's proud.

"Don't touch my hair! I hate you, wang ziyi." Xukun pouts, fixing his hair.

"Why don't we write one right now?" Ziyi suggests, taking out two pieces of blue paper and a pen.

"You planned this." Xukun comments as he takes a paper from ziyi.

The two then folds the paper into hearts. Ziyi writes first, since he has the pen. Then he hangs them on the tree. Xukun takes in how beautiful the older looks as the last bits of sun shines on his face. And how his serious face looks sexy in his eyes.

"Are you done yet?" Ziyi looks at xukun's empty paper heart. "You haven't even started writing!"

"I was thinking of what to write. Wait a moment, will you." Xukun writes on the paper after return to reality.

"What did you write?" Ziyi asks after xukun hangs the heart on the tree.

"It's a secret. But i'll tell you anyway. I wish summer will never end." Xukun recites what he wrote earlier.

"Oh. I wished for your happiness." Ziyi smiles sincerely as he tells xukun his wish. Then he ruffles xukun's hair for the hundredth time that day.

\---

It's one of the summer nights, a few weeks before school starts. Ziyi and xukun spend the night together in xukun's room. Just like how they used to everyday.

They watch a movie on xukun's tv. One which he got for his birthday last year. Ziyi recommends a romance movie for a change, since they barely watch any together. Of course xukun agrees to the idea.

Throughout the whole movie, xukun doesn't pay much attention to the tv. Instead, he is too busy stealing glances at ziyi. Xukun can't help but fall in love with ziyi's facial features. How he focuses on the screen.

"The movie is kind of boring." Xukun groans to gain ziyi's attention.

"Just watch. We're only halfway through the movie. I'm going to finish this tonight." Ziyi's eyes focuses on the tv in front of him.

"Are you on a movie challenge or something? Why did you even think of watching something this cringey, anyway?" Xukun rolls his eyes.

Ziyi nods, "yes, i'm on a challenge to watch the top 10 most watched romance movie of last year." He glances over xukun for a second before returning his gaze towards the tv.

"No way! You must be out of your mind." Xukun sighs in defeat and continues to watch the movie with ziyi.

As the movie climaxes, xukun shifts in his seat. It's about time for the two main characters to kiss. While the long awaited moment plays on the screen, xukun pays attention to the scene. He would learn how the guy leans his head so their nose won't bump as the two share a kiss. And how their hands run on each other's hair.

"Kun?" Ziyi's voice wakes xukun from his focus.

Xukun looks at ziyi. Or more like his lips. "Yeah? What is it, ge?"

He follows ziyi's gaze which is fixed on their lap. That is when xukun realizes he had his hand on the older's thighs. Dangerously close to his private part. He quickly retreats his hand.

"Shoot! I-i'm so sorry! I didn't mean to touch you like that. It's just that-" xukun tries to hide the redness of his face by looking away.

"It's fine. It was an accident. I get it." Ziyi stands up to turn off the tv. The movie has ended without xukun noticing.

The two then prepares for bed. Xukun sleeps on his bed while ziyi on the floor. Although xukun feels bad for making his guest sleep on the hard floor, xukun can't fight ziyi's stuborness.

"Ge, have you ever fell in love?" Xukun suddenly asks as they lay on their respective beds.

"You're asking me? Why? Are you in love, cai xukun?" Ziyi replies but his eyes are still focusing on the while ceiling.

Xukun takes his time before he comments. "No! I'm not in love. I was just asking."

"To be honest, yes. Of course i have. Haven't you?" This time ziyi looks at xukun as he speaks.

Xukun shakes his head. "No. I mean, i don't know. But have you ever kissed anyone, ge?"

"Of course i have. Who dates without kissing? Definitely not me." Ziyi's eyes gets drowsy as he isn't too interested in the conversation.

"So, who's the lucky one?" Xukun braces himself for ziyi's answer which never came.

"It's someone you don't know. Don't think about it too much." Ziyi turns back to face the ceiling.

But xukun doesn't give up. He never does. "You could tell me though. About this significant someone you're crushing on."

"Nope. I'm not going to tell you just because you beg me." Ziyi doesn't show any signs of giving in.

"But i'm cai xukun. You always tell me everything." Xukun rolls on his bed. His body merely on the edge of the bed.

"I did. It's in past tense, kun. We're older now. There's this thing called 'privacy' if you haven't heard." Ziyi still doesn't plan on telling xukun his secret.

"Will you tell me if i promise to keep the secret?" Xukun whispers. Ziyi shakes his head.

"It's getting late. Let's get some sleep." Ziyi stands to turn the lights off. He then returns to his place by xukun's bed.

"Ge, will you tell me if i give you my silver necklace?" Xukun still tries even with the lights off.

Ziyi sighs, "can you please stop bothering me? I'm trying to sleep."

Ziyi's words doesn't have any effect on xukun, though. The boy rolls off his bed, purposely falling on top of ziyi. This time, ziyi doesn't have any choice but to give his attention fully to xukun.

"What are you doing? Get off me." Ziyi tries to push xukun's body away, but fails miserably.

"Will you tell me if i say i like you?" Xukun asks with a serious expression on his face.

"Kun, don't joke around. It's 12 at night. You're just lacking sleep." Once again ziyi tries to get xukun off him. And yet again he fails.

"I'm not lacking anything, ge. I'm being serious." Xukun fixes his gaze on the older boy under him. "I think i like you, wang ziyi."

At first, ziyi doesn't know how to react. Even with no lights, xukun can feel how tense ziyi is upon hearing the sudden confession. Xukun can also sense how ziyi avoids eye contact with him.

"Kun. This isn't right. I'll pretend i never heard any of it." Ziyi finally speaks. His words stab right onto xukun's heart, but he chooses to ignore it.

"Am i selfish if i say i want to kiss you right now?" Xukun's voice comes out low and hoarse.

"You- what?" Ziyi asks to make sure he heard xukun right.

The only reply xukun gives is his lips on ziyi's very own. Xukun has kissed ziyi without permission. He knows he isn't suppossed to make out with someone when they refuse. But ziyi doesn't push xukun away.

Xukun's first kiss is rather shy. He doesn't dare to move, but he also doesn't pull away.

"This isn't right on so many ways." Ziyi breathes out as they pull away to regain air.

"I-i'm sorry. We can stop, if you want to. I won't force you." Xukun feels bad after the kiss, but he can't seem to scoot away from his position.

"No, don't stop. Kiss me, cai xukun." Ziyi whispers onto xukun's lips while he pulls the latter closer to him.

Their lips meet once again. Xukun tilts his face this time to deepen the kiss. But only after he feels ziyi relax under him that xukun starts to suck ziyi's lower lips.

Xukun gets a reply from ziyi soon as the older bites his upper lips. This time xukun lets ziyi takes full control, rolling to trade positions. Xukun then feels ziyi's lips leaving his. Before he could protest, ziyi's lips grazes on his neck.

Ziyi does know what he is doing because all xukun feels right at the moment is pleasure. Soft whimpers leaves his lips as ziyi's tongue traces his jaw.

"We should stop. Your mother is going to find out if we keep going." Ziyi rolls off xukun's soulless body

"Yeah?" The two lock gaze for a few seconds. Before xukun looks away embarrassed.

Ziyi cups the younger's face in his hands. "You're beautiful. Don't ever forget that."

Xukun nods, but he still doesn't dare to look ziyi at the eyes. He feels as if he's done a grave mistake.

"Ge, did you regret it? What we did just now. What does it mean?" Xukun gains courage to ask what's in his mind. Although the answer won't be as pleasing as he thought.

"Kun. Look at me." Ziyi tilts xukun's face closer to his own. "It was never a mistake, okay? You're never my mistake."

The two sleeps side by side on xukun's bed that night. Xukun invites ziyi to lay in bed beside him. In exchange, ziyi makes xukun rest his head on ziyi's chest.

Ziyi's heartbeat lulls xukun to sleep. He thought he won't be able to sleep, since he was nervous around ziyi. But he was wrong. He's at home when he is with wang ziyi.

Xukun was eleven when he had his first kiss. He kissed a thirteen years old wang ziyi. The boy who made his heart beat like crazy. And the boy who broke his heart a million times after.

 

_September 2013_

Too much has happened after ziyi left that summer. Things which shape xukun to become the person he is now. He still remembers how in love he was with the older. Yet so easily ziyi broke his heart. Ziyi told xukun before he left. That everything that's happened between them that summer was more of a summer fling. Its was nothing to him.

Xukun felt like his chest was ripped open and his heart was stabbed so many times it lost shape. He wanted to make ziyi stay. He so badly wants to tell ziyi that it's not like that to him. However xukun was afraid. He could only watch as ziyi's car drove away from their house. And that was the last time he's seen the older.

The fifteen years old xukun has changed. Especially after facing so many hardships in his family. His father left them for some rich woman in the US. And the only person he has left, his mother - she passed away no longer than 3 months after his enrollment in high school.

He doesn't know how to feel. Neither thankful nor regret. But one thing is for sure, his life just keeps going downhill and xukun blames ziyi for it. It was ziyi's fault for leaving.

If only ziyi didn't leave, maybe he would still have someone left in his live. If only ziyi didn't leave, maybe he wouldn't have to face everything alone. If only ziyi didn't leave, maybe his mother won't be too stressed after getting divorced. If only ziyi didn't leave maybe his mother would be very much alive right now. If only ziyi didn't leave, maybe his life won't be as crappy as it is now.

Or maybe it was his fault. Maybe if he tried harder to make ziyi stay, he won't be alone. Maybe if he tried to not fall in love with ziyi, he won't have to bear the hurt. Maybe if he didn't confess that summer, he won't regret his actions. Maybe if he didn't move on, he'll still have something to hold onto.

But everything is all in the past. And what's left is only hatred. He hated ziyi for leaving him like that, after what has happened throughout the whole summer. Which is why, xukun stops. He stops believing in his promise with the boy. He stops coming to the tree where they hang their wishes.

Xukun knows he needs to grow up. There is no use in crying over spilled milk. Either he cherish the remaining bits or discard everything. Xukun chose the latter.

That year, on his birthday, he didn't go sit under the tree. Just like how he used to do every year before then. He used to reminisce the last time he went with ziyi. But this year is different. Xukun plainly folds a paper heart, write his last wish with a marker and hangs it on the tree. As a trademark, that he's been there that day.

 

_July 2018_

Xukun wakes up on the matress once again. He didn't know he cried, not until he feels the wet fabric under his sticky face. Xukun washes his face at the bathroom after fixing the bed.

"Xukun, are you in there?" Zhengting's voice and loud banging on the door wakes him from his trance.

"Yeah. I'll be out in a minute." Xukun's voice comes out hoarse.

Zhengting's face greets his view as soon as xukun unlocks the bathroom door. Zhengting opens his arms wide for xukun to fall into. Xukun takes the gesture, leaning on zhengting's small figure.

Now xukun knows why he feels comfortable with zhengting. It's because he sees ziyi inside him. Zhengting is beautiful, more beautiful than ziyi was back then. He is caring, and very calm. He's always there for xukun. Most of zhengting's acts reminds xukun of his past. What he did with wang ziyi.

"Baobei, are you okay?" Zhengting soothes xukun by placing his hand on xukun's nape.

Xukun shakes his head. "No. I'm far from okay."

"What do you need, kun? I'll make sure you get everything you want." Zhengting's hand starts to make way on xukun's hair.

Xukun then pulls away. He looks at zhengting's features. His eyes so clear, they reflect of xukun. His pink fluffy lips, waiting to be kissed. His fringe, covering his eyebrows.

"Can i kiss you?" Xukun says after debating for a long time.

Zhengting's eyes gaze on xukun's lips before returning to his eyes. As soon as zhengting nods his head, xukun pulls him for a kiss. Their lips dancing in sync as if they forget the world exists around them. Xukun doesn't let zhengting go, even when he gasps for air. He nibbles on zhengting's lower lips. Harder every passing second.

Zhengting has to hit xukun four times on the shoulder to make him stop. After they pull apart, xukun feels blood on his mouth. He fixes his gaze on zhengting's lips to find them bleeding a little on the edge.

"Holy sheep! You're bleeding." Xukun reaches to wipe the stain on zhengting's lips.

"Don't mind it. I'm okay." Zhengting places his hand on xukun's shoulder.

"No, you're not. Go take a seat, i'll be right back." Xukun leaves zhengting go get some ointment from the emergency kit.

Xukun finds zhengting on one of the chairs in the storage room when he returns. Zhengting fiddles with his fingers as he waits. Xukun lays a hand on zhengting's shoulder to get his attention.

"I got the ointment. I'll apply it for you." Xukun uses his hand to dab the cream on zhengting's lips.

"Are you feeling better now?" Zhengting asks, watching xukun's brows crease as he turns serious.

"How can i, when i caused you to bleed." Xukun retreats his hand as he finishes.

"Does the kiss not make you feel any better?" Zhengting questions.

Xukun bobs his head, "only if i didn't bite your lips too hard and causing them to bleed."

"I told you it's fine. I don't feel anything at all." Zhengting smiles brightly this time.

"I'm not fine with it. I ruined your pretty lips." Xukun stands up to return the ointment. But zhengting stops him midway.

"Tell me. Why did you cry in your sleep." Zhengting's voice comes out as a whisper.

Xukun gulps. He doesn't want zhengting to know about his background. However he has no other choices. Zhengting can be quite demanding sometimes. Which is why xukun spills everything to the older.

"You should go." Zhengting says after he listens to the whole story. "Staying any longer won't be too good for you. Go."

If zhengting says it in any other circumstances, xukun might think zhengting is shooing him away. In reality, zhengting knows things has turned out ugly. Which is why he's letting xukun go.

"Are you sure? I mean, you don't want to spend more time with me before i leave?" Xukun looks for an answer in zhengting's eyes.

"I do. You don't know much i want to make you stay. But i'll be selfish if i did that. So, one last date for me?" Zhengting offers a simple smile to xukun.

"One last date for you." Xukun repeats after zhengting.

The date comes sooner than xukun thought. Zhengting comes to find him a couple of days after he asks for the date. Zhengting dresses himself in a plain white shirt and ripped jeans. A checked shirt rests on his hips to add his fashion.

"We're going now?" But my shift isn't over yet." Xukun finds himself eyeing zhengting a second longer than he's supposed to.

"Ditch work. Come have a date with me." Zhengting clings on his arm, ready to pull him outbof the shelter.

Xukun laughs at how childish zhengting could get. "Alright. I'll just get changed for a moment."

After changing into a denim jacket, xukun joins zhengting outside. They walk on the streets holding hands. Xukun has nothing to lose. And neither does zhengting.

Zhengting takes them to the movies. He claims to never watched a movie with xukun before. While xukun just agrees. He'll do anything to keep the smile on zhengting's face for the day.

"Why am i nervous? We're only watching a movie." Zhengting places his hand on top of his heart.

"It's probably because you're going with someone as handsome as me." Xukun jokes, earning a slap on the shoulder.

"Let's go. The movie's starting!" Zhengting pulls xukun to their seat.

The movie is definitely not xukun's style. Romantic comedy. However, zhengting seems to enjoy himself, laughing with everyone every now and then. The view is enough to make xukun feel content. At least today he made zhengting happy.

Nearing the climax of the movie, zhengting lays his hand on top of xukun's. Xukun feels warmth as zhengting interwinds their fingers. The two stays like that until the end of the movie.

"That was the best movie i have ever watched. Considering i went with you." Zhengting sings as they walk out of the teater with everyone else.

"Glad to hear that. It's my pleasure to be a part of your best experience." Xukun grins as he watch zhengting bobs his head.

"Now, let's go get some popsicle. I'm craving for the one from the convenience store." Zhenting once again leads the way.

"You do know that we can get a much better quality ice cream, right?" Xukun follows zhengting's steps down the street.

Zhengting stops in his tracks to face xukun.  "Yes. But i want you to buy me the popsicle. I like them better."

"Whatever you say, baobei." Xukun replies, mimicking zhengting's way of speaking.

"What did you just call me?" A smile grows on zhengting's face as well as the red tint on his cheeks.

"Baobei." Xukun repeats himself. He squishes zhengting's red cheeks lovingly. "Why are you blushing? Are you shy?"

"No." Zhengting slaps xukun's hands away. Clearly flustered with the latter's words.

"You're so cute. Someone might steal you away right now." Xukun teases. Interwinding theing hands afterwards.

Xukun waits as zhengting takes his time choosing the popsicle he wants. He also lets zhengting choose his flavour. Which makes the wait even longer. But it's worth it. If he could see zhengting's cute smile like this, everything is worth it.

After much thought, zhengting gets a cream soda popsicle for himself and a tangerine one for xukun. Of course, xukun pays for them as zhengting is already running away with the popsicles as soon as the cashier scans the barcode.

"Wait up, ting ge. Why are you running so fast?" Xukun huffs after managing to catch up with the overly energetic boy.

"I'm trying to get us a spot by the bench. It's hard to find a spot on this time of day." Zhengting is already licking his popsicle when xukun sits beside him.

"I can't believe you ran just to get us a seat. We could've walked around as we eat this." Xukun complains, fanning himself with a hand.

"Oh, why didn't that idea come to my mind?" Zhengting innocently tilts his head.

"Nevermind. You just like to make me suffer." Xukun tastes his own posicle.

The two enjoys the afternoon leaning in each other's arms. Xukun lays his head on zhengting's shoulder as they watch people pass by. Strangely, zhengting has turned calm after finishing his popsicle. Xukun looks up to make sure zhengting is okay.

"I wonder if i could ever feel this happy again after you leave." Zhengting says.

"Of course you will. You're everyone's happiness, ting ge. I know you'll meet that someone who will look at you just like how you look at me." Xukun sits up from his position to face zhengting.

Zhengting nods, "i might find someone else. But you will always be my first."

They stay quiet for a few more moments. Enjoying each other's presence. Then xukun stands up, "what do you want to do now, ge?"

"Do you want to go to the arcade?" Zhengting looks up to meet xukun's eyes.

"And win you a stuffed teddy? I'm in." Xukun helps zhengting up from his sitting position.

Zhengting and xukun walks excitedly towards the arcade. Visiting the shooting booth first thing as they arrive. Xukun promises to get zhengting the biggest teddy on the prize area. And when he really did win it, zhengting squeals in happiness.

They went to the karaoke room next. Zhengting and xukun sing too loud, other costumers are banging on the door. They don't stop though. Only after they run out of breath that they leave the room.

Zhengting then takes xukun to the photo booth. Of course they can't miss taking a photo on their last date. Xukun makes sure zhengting looks pretty in every picture to make him happy.

Before they know it, it's getting quite late. Zhengting has long put on his shirt. Xukun takes in the image of zhengting cutely wrapped in a checked shirt.

"Let's go. I'll take you home." Xukun offers a hand which zhengting takes.

"Kun, promise me you'll send your goodbyes before you leave. I don't want to spend the day without knowing you've left." Zhengting suddenly sticks out his pinky for xukun to take.

Xukun locks their fingers together. "I promise. I won't leave without telling you. That would be too mean."

They walk in silence for the rest of the way. Xukun stealing glances at zhengting, who is busy holding the giant stuffed teddy in his arms.

As they arrive at zhengting's place, xukun lets go of zhengting's hand. However no one dares to move. Xukun takes the initiative to pull out his phone so they could take a photo.

"Ting ge, the bear is covering half your face. Put that away." Xukun laughs as he sees zhengting's reflection on his phone.

Zhengting does as he is told. " I look puffy at night. We should've taken one in the afternoon."

"We did though. At the photo booth." Xukun pulls zhengting closer to him.

"But it's different." Zhengting protests.

They take a few shots with different angles. Sometimes posing strangely for the sake of being funny. When they are done, zhengting opens his arms for xukun to take. Without wasting any second, xukun places himself between zhengting's arms.

They hug for a long time. Longer than any of them could ever count. Because they are afraid. Letting go of the hug means saying goodbye for real. But zhengting does it at the end. He pulls away from the hug.

"I guess this is how the date ends, then. Goodbye, cai xukun." Zhengting offers a handshake to xukun.

Xukun shakes his head. "Don't make it seem like we'll never meet again. I'll save that last goodbye for some other time."

With that xukun takes one last glance over at zhengting who still has his hand hanging. Xukun smiles widely, might be his last smile for the older. And then turns away.

"Goodbye, zhu zhengting. It was nice knowing you." Xukun whispers to himself as he walks away.

\---

Morning breeze greets xukun as he steps out in the balcony only in his pajamas. A smile tugging to be released as he inhale the earthy scent of nature. Xukun didn't realize how he missed waking up early in the morning until now.

After stretching his back, he proceed to close the glass door. Xukun swears he could have gotten a severe cold if he stood there a second longer. It is definitely better to appreciate the view from behind the cold glass.

A cup of hot coffee is enough to tame his growling stomach, with extra sugar of course. Don't want the bitterness to ruin the day. Leftover doughnut as company for the perfect breakfast.

Xukun then gets ready to start the long day. He's moving out today, better not waste any time in reminiscing his memories in the shore. How he used to work with zhengting on the shelter. How he used to hang out with xiao gui on the beach.

Everything seems so far away right now. Like he haven't done any of them in years. In reality, he actually last did them a week ago. When things weren't as complicated as it is now. When he haven't met the present ziyi a few days prior after not seeing each other for more than 8 years.

Xukun rinses the empty cup before stacking it on the rack. It being the last cup he'd enjoy before leaving the vacant house.

He doesn't want to leave with any memories of the place. So xukun had all his furnitures given away to a junkstore nearby. And his books, are donated to the local library under his name.

Xukun leaves his possesions to another's hand. Almost everything. Except for a piece of folded paper, the edges has turned yellow with age. An old paper heart which he still keeps.

The boy smiles for the last time, scanning the house which is no longer his starting the next day. He had even sold his house to a stranger. Not because he needs cash, but solely because he wants to move on.

Staying in the past won't do any good, he thought. So, he takes a step out of his past. And prepares himself for what awaits him in the future.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter should be from zhengting's pov. Let's see how things happen from zhengting's view.


End file.
